One of the nice orators of our time, Eddie Izzard, as soon as stated of the French, “They’re a bit…fuckin’ French.” Perhaps there is no such thing as a higher instance than the French nationwide workforce, and that covers each the lads and the women.
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With a World Cup now simply slightly below three months away, that in all probability means it’s time for one thing hysterically bizarre to occur. Unless they’re going to drag their different lever, which is melting down through the event and everybody blaming one another’s mom (quite literally). This is a squad in any case that had one member try to blackmail another over a intercourse tape, kick the previous off the workforce for years, after which welcome him again with open arms simply final yr. Quitting on your coach is so passé in relation to this workforce.
So buckle up, as a result of the newest France on France controversy is a doozy. It facilities round Paul Pogba, who for essentially the most half is the sufferer right here. Not fully the sufferer, and the half the place he allegedly isn’t is the inter-France squad weirdness. But that’s not the headline.
Paul Pogba has been the target of an extortion plot, and the plot appears to be spear-headed by his personal brother and a few childhood pals. Mathias Pogba launched a reasonably unusual video on Instagram the place he claimed he would let the world know Pogba’s “crimes,” and made reference to “Kylian,” which appears to imply Kylian Mbappé. Paul Pogba was assaulted in France whereas on worldwide responsibility by masked males, and stated he’d paid the group about $100,000. He additionally says they’ve confronted him in Manchester and on the Juventus coaching floor in Turin, which is lastly when Paul went to the police. It’s after the confrontation in Turin that Paul says he acknowledged his brother as a part of the group. He thinks this all began after he kicked a childhood buddy out of his Manchester condominium after he found the buddy had stolen some $200,000 from him by a bank card theft.
While this appears like some hangers-on getting upset that they not get cash free of charge and going over the sting (allegedly), the true juice is in Mathias’ accusations that his brother, Paul, used a marabout to forged spells on opponents and teammates, together with Mbappé. A marabout is a Muslim holy man or hermit, generally derisively known as a “witch doctor.”
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Paul Pogba, for his half, doesn’t deny utilizing a marabout, however for his personal well being and has by no means directed him outward, because it have been.
This wouldn’t be the primary time Pogba has been on the middle of controversy for the French workforce. After they crashed out of Euro 2020, many fingers from the squad have been pointed at him because of his, let’s assume, “loose” relationship with monitoring again and defending. Switzerland’s second aim within the 3-3 draw was seen because of Pogba being unable or unwilling to discover a fuck to offer as he gave the ball away and tracked again in the identical style as a sloth would possibly.
This was additionally the match that noticed numerous mother and father of gamers arguing within the stands, as Adrien Rabiot’s mom went spoiling for a battle with any and all comers, together with Mbappé’s and Pogba’s households. It’s by no means boring with France.
There have been reports that Mbappeé himself isn’t just shrugging these accusations off because the ramblings of a determined prison attempting to squeeze out no matter money he can from his a lot richer brother. Seeing as how Mbappé is already the final supervisor of PSG, it’s not an enormous leap to suppose he might additionally turn into the identical for the French nationwide workforce. And there in all probability are a good variety of teammates who wouldn’t thoughts Pogba being tossed out within the alley for the nationwide workforce anyway, earlier than all this began.
This is sort of simply the way in which it goes with France, the place both they win the event or they flip into the sort of cleaning soap opera that may even have wrestling followers rolling their eyes (I absolutely count on Bray Wyatt to become involved with France earlier than Qatar now). They completely needed to be restrained from knifing their coach in 2010 in South Africa as they went out within the group stage. Or their biggest ever participant tries to ship his brow to the mind stem of an opponent by his throat in a World Cup last. And because of Karim Benzema, these aren’t even the weirdest issues to occur to them. Apparently, Pogba needed Benzema to be relieved of the strangest act amongst France teammates.
Again, they’re a bit…fucking French.